three days resting

the world doesnt hold back as you wait for tomorrow. it comes on like a bulldozer. doctor visit this morning, good BP but had 10 new skin lesions ripe for the freezing as dr demento came at me with a hissing outgassing grease gun and began to wildly fire frozen nitrogen at my face. i'm still feeling rung up, the lights spinning from the solid hits. my face a road map of pizza sores and pepperonis. the liver enlarged and the diverticulitis spreading soreness in my intestines. what a way to start the week. still no word from the LTD people and its getting past the due date. whatever i have created in this body is coming due. i feel everything physically now, the highest to lowest energies, the truth and the lies. all are part of me now and nothing is kept from the gates of flesh. i do what is needed to continue and dont dispute the tariff, what is needed i pay and keep moving, there is no end to the places i must go. each life a different ride each day a different me another thought of who i could become. i relax in the exceptional feeling that there is no one that i am and nothing to be. the self is just a liquid asset, moved past its prime rate into a defunct debenture, written off on the death and taxes statement i have prepared for just such a rainy day. one last road to tread to pick up my ride before i go to bed and tonight sleep with painful soreness and resign my life to the source of love and all that means for me. love is the only truth and life the road of unmet experiences.