direction has never been the issue

for me, just go and the universe will show the way. Sure, i've ended up in the bushes a few times, no discernable path available. Thats when i make my own, usually to some high ground so i can see the lay of the land, sometimes just back the way i came. What ever seemed right to me. But the vast majority has been acknowledgeable. So much so that i dont question it anymore. Sometimes i ask, sometimes i curse, all times i go where i'm towed. Self will doesnt get me there. Self will says yes or no. It cant choose a new map or a new way to measure time, and time decides everything. the body is the clock, it knows what time the body has  and it sets the alarms. I dont choose to get up at 3:30am. I dont choose when i leave this body, not in the sense of knowing when. The body clock doesnt have LED display or mickey mouse gloved hands, its more meaty and filled with blood and muscle and connected to a vital center that controls all life. And that pulsing Universal Heart has my attention. It tells me everyday is precious and all my concerns mean nothing. The Universal lives Me, not me, the inhabitor of this form. I'm just the caretaker, the housekeeper, making sure everything is working, clean, ready to go. When its all happening, sure, sometimes it feels like i'm in the drivers seat, but when i open my eyes, theres no steering wheel or pedals, just a giant window to a world thats coming at me relentlessly and my squeaky panic could never get me to where i need to go. If i even knew where that was. I'm just a passenger. One of Billions, all being directed for purposes beyond my knowing every second of the totality of existence. Each destined to make this journey as soon as they can figure out, who's driving the bus. Directionless motion, unanticipated events, unquestioned direction. Be alert, watch the movie, there are lots of clues and handy tips on whats going to happen next.
the World has a plan for me, The Universe has a plan for the world and some greater intelligence has the universe well in hand. So I dont try to get ahead of it. All the stuff in my life that i thought i was managing, i had to let go. it was obvious, it was managing me and not like the Universal intelligence, more like the Drill Sargent trying to pound the reality of combat into a childs mentality. Well , i get it now. Stay down, cover your ass, and wait for orders. Thats the plan and i'm sticking to it.
I am on the battlefield, thats a certainty. My soul is the prize of victory or defeat. The enemy is resistance from any source, my allies are awareness and a linkup to command center. Some universal connection that tells me if i'm getting closer or further away from where i should be., which is always as close to the front lines as i can get.just sitting in a hole wont get it as the enemy continuously attacks anything thats not in  motion, especially away from them. i cant discriminate who or what i have to kill to keep moving forward. Its been a bloodbath and theres no sign it going to end anytime soon. even my CO, the latest 90 day wonder, the second lieutenant sent up last month, may be next, certainly all the aides de camp are in my sights. Innocent bystanders, all collateral damage to this battle for existence, to be, really be once and for all.