orgy of the ego

they say im deluded, i see falseness where there is truth and love and beauty, but there is nothing there but the attachments, the energy vampirism, those they say they love, they worry about, they live and die for, those are the false and the killers. their eyes grow empty the skin white and chalky, the life inside sucked out, down to the marrow as they plead and cry and fight the living, the realized the sightful, demanding their rightful place among the victims of their own desires. then when they need the help, the energy the light, they pretend they see the truth, the horrible mistake. their necks bruised, they plead for forgiveness and guidance and secretly harbor the next delicious affair of mutual sickness and degradation. mother , sister brother father, even fido and cleo, always wait at the door wait for more psychic sucking, wait at the other end of the wireless, the mobile, the mad dash in the car and the frenzied feeding, veins are gashed open and an orgy of blood and self righteousness is let loose, none can resist the feeding and they flock, like a murder of crows to the carrion. its always something, the addiction to self debasement, the blinding to the lights truth, none can admit all they really hope for the insatiable needs that come flying to the surface in the very brilliance of the energy released in the process of transformation. it becomes more real, more absolutely undeniable as the energy tries to work its way through the lower chakras. but what can you do, the hounds are loosed and you are run by their screaming frenzy. but the realization after the energy is gone, after the passion has simmered to a sour aftertaste, then the mess and shame and the grief of separation really comes. there is no life other than the true path and once you are on it you cannot go back, no matter how many dying and suffering loved ones are expiring at your feet. be sure you take pictures of yourself in the midst of the mutual bloodsucking and pandering to your upset emotions, and keep that picture on the table next to your bed of thorns at the ashram.