what is it that can be truth

 without it being about my pain. i dont know if i can separate the two. after a lifetime of who i am, i am now a greater reality, a merger of love and being, connected to whatever my consciousness is focusing on. the world is expanding and what is my experience is the realization of being and fulfillment of love. i am not a partial reality or a deformed ego unaware of my limitations. i came to this state through surrender, through decades of sincere seeking and adherence to some strong renunciation and self discipline. what i have become is real and full and robust and complete even as i begin to integrate it into the current space and time of this physical reality. it is the completion of what began 10 years ago, a complete opening that was unable to survive the initial integration due to incomplete surrender and human emotions that were not met or examined. this has been done, and the opening has returned and now the system is prepared and the integration will be successful. what i am is love finding truth and healing the separation, for neither can exist without the other, knowledge is what brought me here and love is the sustainer and completion of all separation, truth is the result of those forces becoming fully integrated and complete. i am becoming love-truth and will be beyond all the forces that propel the creation. from this, the choice to manifest this love-truth in the current physical form will be determined as i cannot from here see the result of that. all i have written here will be manifest within this coming year. what happens following is not forseeable. i write this to the self that is allowing the being to direct all the manifestation of consciousness through out the creation. there is no doubt or attachment to this outcome, there is only pure love for all who have been with me and helped me on this journey and to the divine from which all truth flows on an ocean of love. the pain i spoke of comes from the ending of the relationship with my brother the guru who cannot be my guide and requires i become his devotee, knowing full well i am already surrendered to my love and cannot have two. for this i kiss his feet and thank him for making the choice so simple. love and eternal gratitude from this heart realized in the being we are.